Friday, February 1, 2013
Lifting the Weights Off my Heart
This past weekend I tweeted:
4 This matter arose because some false believers had infiltrated our ranks to spy on the freedom we have in Christ Jesus and to make us slaves. 5 We did not give in to them for a moment, so that the truth of the gospel might be preserved for you.
I had a post planned to rail on all the lies and contortions out there in the world. And I was going to share the truth as I understand it. I was going to talk about the well meaning posts I have read this week that only managed to make me feel out of place in the Christian community because I am neither conservative or liberal. Well, more accurately, I am both conservative and liberal. I was going to share how I'm trying to stand strong on the truth of the gospel and not give away the freedom that I have in Christ Jesus. And to be honest, I am still hurting a little from the posts and I'm still a little angry about the the lies that I am hearing that are weighing me down.
But I don't want that to define me or this blog.
I want to be honest on here. Not just honest about my frustrations, but more importantly I want to be honest about what is going in my heart. So I'm not going to rail on those things. I'm not going to try to nicely skewer people or their opinions. I'm going to tell you that this has been a rough week. It has been busy with professional things, but it's more than that. These previously mentioned things are weighing down my heart and taking my attention. My heart has struggled to find the courage to engage in love. My attention has been in other places. I've have had difficulty staying engaged with people and listening to them. I so desperately want to love people as Jesus loved. I want to see those that pass by me every day hurting and needing Him. I want to hear his whisper telling me to smile at that person or feel his nudge to pat this person on the back. I want to see Jesus in those around me. I want to Jesus to just spill out of me and on to those near by.
Lord help me put aside these words that have sucked the space out of my life. Help me pick up the words that give me space for others.