Sunday, April 24, 2011

Did I seriously say that?

So this Easter there were probably at least twice, where I had a thought and then responded to myself with "Seriously?"  With all the thoughts that have been going around in my head this Easter season, I thought I was prepared for Easter.  I was really going to understand it better this year.  I wasn't going to get caught up in the "Easter Bunny"ness of it.  Yesterday we delivered a few dyed eggs and fruit snacks to a few older people in our neighborhood.  (I don't claim the idea for this.  Go here for the full story.)  I was feeling pretty good about my attitude.  It was a crazy busy weekend (e.g. being gone from our house from 1:30pm -10:30 pm Sat. and from 7:30 am - 4:00pm today) and that did negatively affect my attitude a couple times.  That is the nice way of saying I got really annoyed and thought some nasty things several times.  So maybe I wasn't really as ready as I thought.  And that showed up a couple times today.

During the Easter drama, 'the crowd' has to shout.  Once it was, "Blessed is he!"  And the other was, "Crucify him!"  Being a backstage organizer (Helping Drew get in and out of costume and get bloody and unbloody.), I helped yell as well.  When I yelled "Crucify him!", I thought "Oh my gosh! Did I just say that?"  And the immediate answer to that was yes.  I really did say that and I do say that every time I look more at myself and less at him.  When I get all obsessed about what is going on with me and in my life and my opinions, I am saying that all over again.  I am putting him back up there on that cross with my sin.  That makes me sad.

The second time is related to the first one.  After church, I was helping Drew get more unbloody.  I saw he had a mark on him.  I asked him about it and he said it was a mark from the whip the guards were using.  They  missed the cross once and hit him by accident.  (Hitting the cross made the appropriate loud noise and whipping sound.).  I thought "Oh that must have hurt.  I hate that got hurt doing that."  Wow! Did I just say that?  He is reenacting what happened 2000 years ago.  Jesus really was whipped.  He really did have a crown of thorns on his head.  He really was crucified.  He really did carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.  And I think, "Aww..sad about a little mark."  Wow, just wow!  To reinforce the idea, here is a photo of the mark on Drew.

The mark on Drew

So while I do think I have grown in faith this Easter season, I still have a very long way to go!!


  1. I thought that the first time i was in the play. Its weird to think that your saying "crucify him". I didnt want to say it when i first found out but it was part of the play. Hearing myself and others say it just felt hmm.. wrong i guess is the word. Its crazy when you think about it that people actually were saying this years ago and it actually happened.

  2. It is crazy to think that people were actually saying it because it seems so obviously wrong. I guess maybe it didn't seem so odd to them because they didn't have the Holy Spirit with them to make it feel weird.