Sunday, April 24, 2011

Did I seriously say that?

So this Easter there were probably at least twice, where I had a thought and then responded to myself with "Seriously?"  With all the thoughts that have been going around in my head this Easter season, I thought I was prepared for Easter.  I was really going to understand it better this year.  I wasn't going to get caught up in the "Easter Bunny"ness of it.  Yesterday we delivered a few dyed eggs and fruit snacks to a few older people in our neighborhood.  (I don't claim the idea for this.  Go here for the full story.)  I was feeling pretty good about my attitude.  It was a crazy busy weekend (e.g. being gone from our house from 1:30pm -10:30 pm Sat. and from 7:30 am - 4:00pm today) and that did negatively affect my attitude a couple times.  That is the nice way of saying I got really annoyed and thought some nasty things several times.  So maybe I wasn't really as ready as I thought.  And that showed up a couple times today.


During the Easter drama, 'the crowd' has to shout.  Once it was, "Blessed is he!"  And the other was, "Crucify him!"  Being a backstage organizer (Helping Drew get in and out of costume and get bloody and unbloody.), I helped yell as well.  When I yelled "Crucify him!", I thought "Oh my gosh! Did I just say that?"  And the immediate answer to that was yes.  I really did say that and I do say that every time I look more at myself and less at him.  When I get all obsessed about what is going on with me and in my life and my opinions, I am saying that all over again.  I am putting him back up there on that cross with my sin.  That makes me sad.

The second time is related to the first one.  After church, I was helping Drew get more unbloody.  I saw he had a mark on him.  I asked him about it and he said it was a mark from the whip the guards were using.  They  missed the cross once and hit him by accident.  (Hitting the cross made the appropriate loud noise and whipping sound.).  I thought "Oh that must have hurt.  I hate that got hurt doing that."  Wow! Did I just say that?  He is reenacting what happened 2000 years ago.  Jesus really was whipped.  He really did have a crown of thorns on his head.  He really was crucified.  He really did carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.  And I think, "Aww..sad about a little mark."  Wow, just wow!  To reinforce the idea, here is a photo of the mark on Drew.


The mark on Drew


So while I do think I have grown in faith this Easter season, I still have a very long way to go!!

2 comments:

  1. I thought that the first time i was in the play. Its weird to think that your saying "crucify him". I didnt want to say it when i first found out but it was part of the play. Hearing myself and others say it just felt hmm.. wrong i guess is the word. Its crazy when you think about it that people actually were saying this years ago and it actually happened.

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  2. It is crazy to think that people were actually saying it because it seems so obviously wrong. I guess maybe it didn't seem so odd to them because they didn't have the Holy Spirit with them to make it feel weird.

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